You always want to make sure that the first date does not become the last. A woman is afraid to scare off a man with her clothes and behavior, to seem uptight or, conversely, approachable. But young people who are not chasing brands and are not representatives of the elite want to see in front of them the person they invited on a date, and not a top model or a beautiful princess. Repeat this thought to yourself several times: he has already chosen you once. All you have to do is not ruin the situation by taking into account the recommendations for creating an image.
What does etiquette tell girls about a first date?
You are feminine, romantic and positive, but “without distortions or exaggeration.” Not your option? Then remember how you appeared before the young man on the day he invited you on a date. Repeat this set (repeat does not mean wearing the same things!), but add a little festiveness.
What should be avoided almost always - this is a sexual provocation. If you got the golden ticket, you are confident in your ideal appearance, but you know for sure that the gentleman has an incredibly wide choice, then allow yourself a little eroticism (a little!). You still face different tasks than the average nice girl who met an ordinary but pleasant young man.
What is possible, what is not?
Can:
- be recognizable (he liked you the way he saw you before making a date. Therefore, you should not deviate from this course or radically change your appearance);
- be clear from a gender point of view (a man should see you as a woman, which is why skirts and dresses are preferable to trousers and shorts);
- be dressed in practical and wrinkle-resistant fabrics (you don’t want to wear a “chewed” dress or wrinkled skirts?);
- be dressed according to age (a suit consisting of a skirt below the knee and a jacket is an “age-appropriate” set; under 55 years old, do not wear it on first dates).
It is forbidden:
- wear sexually aggressive outfits (for some men, not only mini and deep necklines are a challenge, but also see-through fabrics);
- compose a look from only sports items (exceptions are possible, but are related to the lifestyle of the young man and the place of the date);
- create an image from things of a complex cut (be clearer, closer to your boyfriend);
- lose a sense of proportion (do not weigh yourself down with jewelry, avoid the “open top + open bottom” combination, and if you like glitter, then let it be only on shoes or only on one element of the image);
- wear something you don’t know how to wear;
- wear untested shoes (they may rub or have poorly stitched soles, and after half an hour of walking they are destined to tear);
- choose sky-high heels (exception: you are a professional in wearing high heels, and it will not be difficult for you to stay in them for several hours).
It is often difficult for women to comply balance between modesty and revealing outfits. One rule says: emphasize your gender characteristics. The second insists: Don't appear approachable or overly erotic. In fact, both recommendations get along well with each other, you just have to move away from emphasizing the buttocks and chest, and instead focus on the waist. By highlighting the difference between your hips and breasts, you can safely and subtly remind your boyfriend that this is a beautiful girl in front of him.
It just so happens that many modern girls resort to jeans and trousers much more often than to clothes with a hem. In this case, you need to start from the fact that Do you even know how to wear dresses and sundresses?. If not, then having a “drill” on the first date is not a good idea.
Choosing the right image
The most important thing is to remember that an image is not a mask. Don’t hide your real self behind a veneer, but also do not descend to a dismissive or protesting level: they say, “get used to seeing me unpresentable, if you fall in love like this, you will flourish.”
Clothes for a first date with a guy
Template option: a feminine look that includes a skirt (slightly above the knee, knee-length or slightly below) or dress (not mini, no psychedelic or animal print). The solution is proven and successful, but only in the absence of the following context:
- you go to places where skirts and dresses are not worn or would be uncomfortable to wear;
- you don’t know how to wear such clothes;
- you feel insecure and constrained in such wardrobe items.
In the latter cases, we take jeans or trousers. They do not need to be combined with formal or office jackets, they should not have abrasions or cuts. Firstly, some men compare girls in torn jeans to sausages. Secondly, are you sure that the hero of your novel will understand that you are wearing fashionable pants and not a worn-out item? Third, do you want to fit in with presentable people? Start looking like them in appearance. And their wardrobe hardly includes only jeans with scuffs, an abundance of metal decor or torn holes.
What shoes to wear?
Ideally, you should go for something with a slight heel. This is practical and fits the purpose of showing a man that you are a woman. At the same time, this approach to creating an image will allow you to take a walk along the street or park after a cafe, rather than run to the pharmacy for a band-aid or go home dreaming of making a foot bath.
However, such advice is divorced from the context of the situation. If your physical characteristics do not allow you to wear even a modest heel for several hours, or the date will take place in a place where it is much more comfortable to wear sneakers, boots or even slippers, feel free to choose such shoes. It's better to take care of yourself than to suffer by wanting to appear like an elegant queen in luxurious shoes.
Accessories, parts, little things
Do you need a large bag on a date? The answer is obvious: no. That's why choose something compact. At a minimum, get rid of the need to carry extra weight with you. But also It's not worth it at all without a handbag, because you need somewhere to put a minimum set of cosmetics and a wallet.
The latter will also come in handy in case of a hasty “retreat” (you’re not sure that a noble knight or a handsome prince will come to your first meeting, so money for a taxi is necessary) and with your gentleman’s progressive view on the issue of paying for pleasures. Who knows, maybe he won’t pay for you in a restaurant?
You shouldn’t give up not only your bag, but also your jewelry. Only try to avoid excesses. The same applies to accessories, but from the point of view of their expressiveness. You need an accent; highlight some part of your image or the dignity of your figure, but not all at once.
Tips for girls
Dress in a way that a man can understand. Let's say you personally like a lingerie-style dress, simple and possessing exclusively the features of its style direction. But put yourself in the young man's shoes. Are you sure that he will understand what is happening and will not think that you accidentally forgot to change clothes and came on a date in a slip?
This rule also applies to color.. It’s better to put off things with complex or dark shades for later. Focus on simple and deep tones. Have you decided on the classics? Good, but not in the case of the combination “white top, black bottom”. Such a union is already on a subconscious level attached to officialdom, dress code, office and school life. But you are not a colleague or a classmate, you are a girl.
Important! Don’t inadvertently take on unnecessary roles; remain a woman for a man. Remember that he is not looking for a secretary, not a fashion guide, or a night butterfly. Because don’t wear work outfits on the first date, don’t put together an ensemble of crazy relevant but complicated things (all in the name of “pretty” labels is not our way) and Avoid clothing items charged with sexual aggression.
Also very it is important to consider the place and time of the date. Remember that evening dresses are designed for evening and night time. In the daytime, and especially in the morning, such wardrobe items look out of place. Consider the following points:
- Are shoes with heels possible or do you need something more practical, suitable for a certain type of activity;
- price and stylistic category of clothing (in a bar you will look appropriate in jeans and boots (sneakers), in a budget cafe - in casual outfits, in a really expensive restaurant - in a cocktail or evening dress, in a mid-level restaurant - in a pretty feminine but not a luxurious dress);
- type of bag (in the daytime, in a cafe or in the park, take a casual bag or a small leather backpack; in the evening, you should switch to less capacious options - envelopes, clutches).
And definitely consider your boyfriend's personality. You can spend several hours, or even days, on putting together an image, but if your chosen one is some kind of blogger or IT specialist, then he is quite capable of coming to a meeting with you in his favorite jeans (shorts) and a sweater that has managed to survive its best days ( T-shirt). Will you feel comfortable next to him if you transform into a girl with a perfect hairstyle, high heels and a cocktail dress?
Or another option: he is an office employee, he made an appointment right after work. Before he had time to change clothes, he arrived at the meeting place, and there a beautiful creature in a leopard print dress and leather jacket was waiting for him. And it seems like nothing terrible or criminal happened, but at such a moment it is easy to transfer the inconsistency and incompatibility of outfits to the relationship itself. And now it’s not the clothes that don’t fit, but the gentleman (lady) himself.
Consider the weather. In spring and autumn, nylon tights will be appropriate, but not in cold weather.
And most importantly: don't try to pretend to be something you're not. Even if the transformation and game of being a beautiful stranger succeeds, then when meeting your true self, the young man may feel disappointed or deceived. However, the song “love me as I am” doesn’t work in life either. Because try to “darken the shortcomings and highlight the advantages”, but do it softly, without general retouching and a mask.
Recommendations for choosing an image for a guy and a man
The rules are the same: consider the place and time of the date, as well as the personality of your girlfriend. If this is not enough for you, then here are a few more valuable notes:
- White trousers or jeans are a good option for summer, but not for walking or visiting the park. If you sit on a bench or grass, you will get dirty.
- If shoes can be polished, they should be polished. For some reason, some girls determine a guy’s wealth and his attitude towards himself by his shoes.
- A formal dress code is allowed in two cases. First: you are driving home from work and simply don’t have time to change clothes. Second: the level of the establishment where the first date is taking place places special demands on the guests’ appearance.